Bonus topic – ever looked at a word so long that it stops making sense and you swear it’s spelled wrong, even though you’ve checked it in the dictionary?
The trigger warning is mostly because I’m going to be talking about relationships and I’m pretty happy with mine and I don’t want people to start reading this and getting all disgusted because I’m horrendously sickening when I talk about Hairy. It’s mostly a light hearted way of saying bugger off all ye who do not appreciate cute couples. Ok? Cool.
Hairy and I are in a good relationship; we’ve been together for about two and a half years and while it hasn’t always been the easiest, the bad times have never lasted and we’ve always managed to talk about whatever’s going wrong. Now what I don’t understand is the couples I know who don’t talk to each other or communicate what they’re feeling. For me the communication is the most important and precious thing about being with Hairy – I can talk to him about anything, and although we do argue we can always come back to it and talk through what’s upset me (normally me!).
So for example, I have the most appalling memory. I will forget something that I’ve just said, I’ll mis-remember things that happened and don’t even get me started on remembering lyrics to songs! Metallica has a song – King Nothing, that we both like because Hairy sings (rumbles) a fragment of it at me occasionally:
“I want that star,I want it now
I want it all and I don’t care how
Careful what you wish
Careful what you say
Careful what you wish, you may regret it
Careful what you wish, you just might get”
Full lyrics here.
He sings it because I’m big on wishes, and first star I see I always say “Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight I wish I may, I wish I might, have this wish I wish tonight”. Et voila, link for Hairy and a tradition is born that we both make a wish. I have an amazing idea for a tattoo – half sleeve of all things to wish upon: a star, falling autumn leaf, a dandelion clock, golden dragonfly, and a pocket watch with the hands at 11:11 on my right shoulder/arm. Then around my wrists: left wrist says “Careful what you wish” and the right has “You just might get it”. It would be pretty amazing, but I’ve got way off topic here. I mis-remembered the song and mixed it up with some other lyrics but refused to accept that Hairy was right (because he’s ALWAYS right and it bugs me), until I heard the song the other day and grudgingly accepted that he was right. BUT the point I was making is that he didn’t get angry and left me to sort it out in my own head.
It’s sometimes scary and upsetting not being able to remember words that left your lips not more than a minute before. I’m not quite sure why I have this problem with my memory, but it always seems to strike at the worst moment and leaves me confused, and then Hairy helps me through it or now knows when to move on.
I know a couple of couples (hehe! I wonder if there’s an actual descriptor for a collection of couples) who are either really new into a relationship, or are having troubles in an existing long term one, and are distancing themselves from their other halves because either the boyfriend is hurting them in some way – not physically, but by being thoughtless or unkind, or because they need their own space. (I’m saying boyfriends here because the girlfriends are the ones who talk to me about their relationships) I don’t really understand this – in the two and a half years that I’ve known Hairy, I’ve never wanted to be apart from him and as my family can attest, I spend a lot of time talking to or about him when I’m home. One thing I do is text him throughout the day because he likes to get the messages and know what I’m doing. Some people find this cloying and wouldn’t text unless they’ve got something to say, but I like just sending “I love you”.
It’s the women I know that are almost acting as if they’re not quite in a relationship – not cheating or being unfaithful, but getting on with their own lives without talking to their boyfriends about it. I couldn’t do that – I’m not dependent on Hairy, but I let him know where I’m going and what I’m doing. I understand their reasons for it in most cases, but I don’t understand a relationship where you have reached that point. I have my own interests and hobbies, Hairy less so because he’s a tired and lazy bum when he comes home and we’re not rich enough to join a gym yet.
I know that we sound like a sickening, cloying type of couple, and I can completely understand where you’d get that from! To be honest though, I’d rather have my relationship dynamic over any other other couple’s that I know. For me and Hairy, it feels like an even pairing where we each put into the relationship what we get out of it. We’re equally cute, loquacious (awesome word!), friendly, outgoing, lazy and messy… I can’t imagine a better match.
Hey look, it’s a pretty cat with a ribbon. Cute, hey? I’m trying to convince Hairy to let me have a pet even though I know it’s not possible because we want to go travelling and that would mean abandoning a pet with family or friends, or putting off travelling until it dies. Any suggestion for cute, fluffy, short lived pets? (Joke!)
Aaaaaanf… Hairy using a giant knife for his pancake (at my insistence), and no beard. Freaky, huh? Plus the bottle of wine we were bought for basically playing with a cat for an evening. She liked licking my nose.