Today’s blog prompt I am ignoring because currently I am beyond frustrated. I started a temporary position at Waterstones about a week ago, and it’s great. I’m busy, it’s stressful at times and I’m not really sure what I’m doing half the time but it’s good fun. Unfortunately my hopes of being offered a more permanent position have been effectively scuppered by some of the permanent staff there (not that they were mean, it’s just that it’s not likely to happen).
So I thought I’d have a quick look at jobs today, just in the spirit of not being lazy. I found a brilliant looking position working in Nottingham, in the heritage sector which is something I’m really interested in doing. Guess what? It’s an apprenticeship which means that it’s not even worth applying for it because I have a degree. Graduates aren’t allowed to do apprenticeships, but sure as hell we can’t get a job anywhere else. My family had a joke about it over the weekend: “What do you ask a PHD student? Can I have a burger and chips please”. It’s one of those things that’s so close to home for me that it’s not actually funny.
I want to get a job. I really, honestly, painfully so want to get a job but I just can’t seem to get properly employed except as a cleaner. And I hate hoovers. Over qualified and under experienced and frustrated. I can’t get any money if I sign on, I can’t volunteer as a teaching assistant because they require a long term commitment and I can’t afford that and I can’t find a decent job for love nor money.
It’s not that I want to be in this position. I don’t enjoy having stupid amounts of time off between my shifts. I would like to be rushed off my feet and busy and achy at the end of the day. At least then I feel like I’m doing something. I have applied for and been rejected from everything from full graduate business opportunities to working at Wetherspoons. I have spent weeks searching for vacancies and worrying over being suitable for the position, having suitable interview clothes and wondering why I was rejected again.
It’s particularly annoying that the things I want to do often require having your own car. But to have a car I need to have a reliable income and so it goes in a big frustrating circle. *Has a rageful spasm* Why won’t they employ me?! Probably because raging inarticulately at my laptop and the internet in general isn’t going to help, so I shall go and apply calmly for some more jobs and then bead angrily and hope that the wire doesn’t snap again because if it does I may just throw something.